2011 In Reflection

2011 was definitely a great year for so many reasons. Not only for each difficult experience, but for the good that came out of it. The end of the year is an important time, not only to celebrate the hope of the future, but realize that the hope of a better future depends on reflection of the past and holding on to the  lessons learned from that past.

Let me list out a few of the reasons I’m so thankful to have lived full and well in 2011…

1. I got to travel more than most people do in their lifetime, but with each lonely take off, it gave me a chance to really get to know myself and find gratitude for every time I landed safely home.

2. I realized that I had to come to terms with everything that made me want to run away, because wherever you go, and whatever you do, you’re still you.

3. I lost a couple friends along the road, but I got to reconnect with old friends and made new, amazing, and unforgettable ones.

4. I went further away from God than I ever have, and ended up right back where I should be, in front of Him.

5. I had my heart broken, and although I’m still recovering, the future looks hopeful.

6. I restarted my blog and had more followers and views than in 3 years of writing on and off.

7. I started doing work I actually truly enjoy and have begun the process of rebranding my professional image.

8. I broke my cycle of debt and took up more self control. (Thank you God and Dave Ramsay)

9. I pushed myself harder and challenged myself more in my work than I ever have before.

10. I learned some difficult lessons of life: about love, work, God, friends, and purpose, and the inevitability of growing up.

 

“When she was just a girl

She expected the world

But it flew away from her reach

So she ran away in her sleep

And dreamed of paradise”

Deck out your sweet new Christmas gift…

If you’re one of the strong ones who held out until Christmas to get the iPhone 4S, good for you!

Here’s a few fun, quirky ways to supe up that boring old phone that is SO October 2011 (and soon to be replaced, no doubt).

iPhone Boombox anyone?

http://mashable.com/2011/12/27/iphone-4s-accessories-2011/

It Begins, …Challenge #1

The first challenge has commenced.

In keeping with my previous post “To Completion“, allow me to fill you in on this most recent venture.

OK, let’s face it – you’ve heard this line before. There are tons of apps out there. Did you know there are over 13,000 healthcare apps (for docs and patients) and thousands more in development? The story goes – the more you’re brewing, the hotter you’re stewing…. or something along those lines.

But when it comes to amateur photogs such as yourself, and myself, we want to invest in the best camera….applications….. money can buy. So what better trusty source than your local unpaid tech brands marketer aka self-proclaimed “technie”. *Sighs as she dreams of the world domination possible if only she knew HTML5…

That leads me to my first challenge, and one for which I have been eagerly preparing.

Challenge #1: Try the “best” camera apps out there and review them based on:

1) Ease of use

2) Affordability

3) Features/Options

4) Social integration

5) Quality

6) the “IT” factor (gets your photos to look the way you never knew you wanted them to look)

The list that initiated the app downloads began with an article from TIME magazine and ended with suggestions from friends (thank you Pete Cashmore at Mashable) along with every tech site’s input on the top 5 camera apps – thanks but no thanks “TechnoBuffalo.com”, I think I’ll decide which apps I think are best for my hard earned $1.99.

That list includes the following apps:

RULES:

1) I am updating you on the status of this challenge. It has commenced.

2) I will continue to post other, irrelevant, blog posts in the interim.

3) The timeline set forth shall end on Friday, December 30th.

4) I am counting on you to keep me engaged in order to keep you engaged – so send me suggestions of themes to photograph with these camera apps!

5) In order to keep you interested, I have to remain interesting and relevant – so send me those suggestions and I will randomize your suggestions on random.org and post the winners and those will get their pictures!

6) If you want to make this more challenging for me – bring it on! Send those suggestions!

7) I plan on posting all of the pictures at the end of this challenge.

Can It Be So?

I had a mildly stunning revelation tonight.

Allow me to recall it to you in customary self-indulgent blogger fashion.

It was a pleasantly chill December night, the night after Christmas. The post holiday shoppers were out in their lazy-best, sort of as an after-Christmas-thought and still not totally willing to break with their vacation time coziness. So, weary-eyed they wandered out into the crisp winter air, air that stubbornly clung to the mood of fall and refused to sprinkle a single flurry for fear of exciting North Carolinians into a festive frenzy.

I too, joined these phlegmatic families in what should be called “Black Friday: Part Deux” as the parking lots filled with metal frame and rubber, and the shops beckoned each visitor, come, but please exchange that gift rather than return it.

I was admittedly in the group with the latter of intents and had no business doing business with the shopkeepers. I was on a single mission, and that was to return the rubbish I was sent to return.

Before this story begets you snoring, let me get to the gist of my message.

The epiphany came when I set foot on those glistening, ceramic tiles and spied my reflection in the shiny 50% off toys displayed on towers of mirrors and stages, proudly displaying their wares, however craftily dressed. Any unprotected customer might easily fall captive to their entrapments, but not I. I was mentally and physically prepared for the onslaught that I knew would come.

Suffice it to say that I left that district of self loathing and torment (via making yourself broke, but oh so pretty!) and realized how incredibly happy I was, in spite of myself, for my one purchase. Now, my backstory requires me to share with you how much of my life I had previously invested in finding happiness through consumeristic pursuits. And this one coffee I had bought for myself in that environment that previously gave me so much joy, apparently confused my psyche and encouraged that swarm of endorphins to swallow me in vain self-affirmation and confidence….in what? I had not a clue. I just knew that I felt good.

And so that brings me to the moral of my story. Or rather, the revelation of my self reflection. Although I buy coffee at Starbucks as much as any normal person does (maybe less more recently), the fact that I bought something for myself in that same environment that I had avoided for so long as I slowly begin to draw out the evil materialistic habits so ingrained within me had unexpectedly  awakened my conscience to how far this cathartic process had come.

It boils down to a very simple equation.

I + buy + things = I + happy

I + avoid + buying things = I + unhappy

And there you have it. My happiness, it turns out, was wrapped up in my consumerism. Now that may not be as revelatory for some as it is for myself, but to realize that what I had always denied about myself, what I had always claimed I could stop at any moment and remain the same, turned out actually to be true. This was deeply troubling and I proceeded to walk out of that mall with my spirits, disparaged, and my soul, distraught.

But in the end, I’m glad I came to terms with this realization, that way, I know I’m going down the right path if I’ve struck a nerve. And as depressing as it is, it encourages me to continue this renewal process in the hopes of becoming a person who doesn’t cling to material things to define her self worth and happiness.

The End.

To Completion

In the spirit of new beginnings with the upcoming new year’s resolutions starting to form in the minds of many a young, hopeful soul, I am going to start a new blog series where I take things to completion (ergo the title of this post).

In order to maintain some accountability, I will publish my posts publicly, and not hide them in shame in my Drafts folder, like I am prone to do at times.

If you see me lacking in consistency and follow-through, I challenge you to call me out – in whatever public, shameful, internet-wide harrassment you can muster in true double-dog-dare fashion.

The RULES are set out thus:

1) Once I begin a self-induced challenge post, I must update you on the status of the venture at least once a week.

2) I am allowed to post other, irrelevant posts in between challenge updates.

3) I will set out a timeline concurrent with each challenge.

4) I will count on you to keep me engaged in myself and my efforts; although it sounds like a small return on the investment of your time, I promise to try really hard not to disappoint you.

5) I will try to keep you interested in whatever challenge I take on.

6) Once in a while, I will solicit challenge suggestions from you all. Only once in a while.

7) If possible, I will post at least one picture with each challenge.

And since 7 is the perfect number, I’ll leave this version of RULES set for now.

So in the spirit of challenge and self-accountability, I challenge you to keep yourself accountable by keeping me accountable through challenging me to stay accountable to myself, and to you.

GOALS I hope to achieve:

1) Self-realization about deep spiritual, physical, meta-physical, and immaterial truths

2) Post more than 6 posts in one year (see 2011 Archives)

3) Change the world

4) Feel accomplished

If this war I’ve waged against procrastination falls through before its ripe, you will most likely not see this post in a few hours….

…Challenge, accepted.

Iceland, Day 2

Good evening and greetings from Reykjavik!
Today was another eventful day full of beautiful landscapes and beautiful people.

We started the morning with a nice bus ride to some horse stables. I wish I could remember the adventure company. But we rode those horses for about an hour and a half through some Lord of the Rings looking land and all I wanted to exclaim was, “Legolas, what do your elf eyes see! Þ – that is the question mark symbol I cannot find.

Nothing too adventurous happened on that horse ride except my horse overtaking all the slowpokes horses and displaying his alpha dominance. He was an aggressive one. We went quite fast.
Afterward we quickly got on our bus to take a journey to the Blue Lagoon resort and spa where the glorious hot springs awaiting our sore bums.

At the Blue Lagoon, we got our change on in the middle of a naked European stocked dressing room. Once we got out to the hot springs, it was too cold to be naked, but we quickly got in the water and all was well. It wasn´t as hot as I thought it´d be and there were patches of hotter water and cooler. It was set up like a huge pool like you´d find at any beach resort, with a lazy river type layout and some bridges over waterways, etc. The saunas and steam rooms were sweet and I totally got macked on by some random old guy. There were a lot of old guys there. And then a whole tour bus full of younger guys came just as our pruney bodies were escaping the cloudy, mineral filled jacuzzi. I really hope that algae I put all over my face will cure all the diseases I never knew I had.

Afterward we came back to the city and I strolled around for a bit and did some window shopping and met my roommates ö who are awesome btw, two Scots and an American and they are super nice.

Just got back from dinner downtown with Ali, Kirsten and Nadia and passed all the hostelers at a pub doing their pub crawl thing. We had some amazing Icelandic goulash at, ironically, a place called Cafe Paris which was all the rave in my Iceland tourist book. Along with that I had a moistilly delicious chocolate cake with strawberries and skipped the coffee as it is bed time and I am quite spent after a fun-filled day.

Tomorrow we are going to do some more amazing things and I need to go to sleep. Just heard some young foreign sounding punks leaving the lobby saying, “I got plenty of time to sleep when Iḿ dead”……..well, Iḿ mostly dead already so the reverse must be the case for me.

Anyways, too tired to think logically much more. Hopefully my camera isn´t dead yet.
LÆove and kisses from across the chilly waters!

All you postcard people will be receiving your postcards soon!

Ciao! or as they say in Iceland, Góða nótt.

Good night!

Iceland

Why does the caged bird sing? Because he longs to see beauty like this.

Today I arrived in Reykjavik (pronounced RAY-KA-VICK), Iceland. After a 5 hour and 2 minute flight, exactly, next to an endearing Spanish couple who wouldn’t stop making out, we had a chilly welcome at Keflavik International airport. Oddly enough, the Iron Maiden Final Frontier World Tour private jet was hanging out at the airport as well and this Spanish couple went nuts. Along with all the other crazy metal obsessed foreigners. Needless to say, a surprising welcome. The clouds hung low and we didn’t clear them until land was about a mile below us. A cheery green landscape was all we could see for miles and miles, along with a white-washed coast of icy cold water crashing against cliffs and rocks.

After I went through passport control, I realized I forgot my camera bag somewhere near the escalator down as I was busy taking pictures of every Icelandic sign in the airport (pictures to come). Just before the shuttle left I ran back and saved myself from a terrible weekend of regret. The passport guys were nice.

So now here I am, sitting in the hostel lobby blogging as these Jersey Shore type fellas and a crowd of what seems like a million Norweigians, Germans, and Australians try to check in. Seems like these are the types I always run into traveling.

Upon arriving in Reykjavik, which was an hour ride from the airport. I realized I was way too early to check in at the hostel, so I took a nice nap with my luggage and other sleepy travelers on the lobby sofa. When I woke up, I could see it was raining through the glass walls and decided to go back to sleep. Around 12 GMT Greenwich time, I awoke and decided to check my email. Luckily, the other lovely ladies I am traveling with emailed me and decided we should go eat lunch. I met up with them at their sweet Hilton and we lunched at a tasty vegetarian place where I had a bowl of hot tomato soup *so delicious* and all sorts of salads and THE most delicious wholesome multigrain bread I’ve ever had, along with a latte of course. As exhausted as I was from the rough week and travel, I was stoked to be here.

Afterward we came back to the Hilton and booked all our trips for the weekend. More deats to come! :] And headed back to my hostel on Laugavegur st, the main shopping street in downtown which leads right into the city centre. After checking in and luckily scoring an empty shared room with no roommates, we headed into downtown to do some window shopping and get more coffee. Coffee is a fantastically delicious and common phenomenon here, as are Irish pubs ironically…but I guess that makes sense since Ireland is just a hop, skip, and jump away. Other things: Coke here tastes weird, so does the water in my hostel (the Hilton’s tap water is delicious of course); there is a LOT of graffiti everywhere but it is SO artful and well placed that it looks like they hired a street artist to paint murals everywhere. The architecture is a mix of old world traditional European with colorful buildings scattered in between and then really modern, geometrical buildings of gray and black. The people are all blond and beautiful, although not always very friendly. The dollar to the kronur (ISK) is $100 to about 11400 ISK. To put that in context, the weird tasting Coke I bought was 250 ISK which was $2.19 American dollars. I think they prefer the American monies here. Also, kronur bill currency looks really cool. Also, Iceland was nativelly called Island and that is why I see postcards everywhere with a picture of the island and “Island” as the caption. The keyboard I am typing on is all wacked up with the question mark up near the backspace button and some crazy Alt Gr key along with keys with symbols of circle, two dots next to each other, and other things that I cannot describe but also don’t know how to get to type. There is a sign on the computer monitor for using the @ symbol which is on the Q key. I didn’t see the sign and had to ask the cute Australian Jersey shore looking stud to help me type.

Anyways, now that I am washed up (in the nasty communal shower – which I had the pleasure of using while some dude was taking a dump), fed, dry, and wore out, I will leave you with one last tasty tid bit before I sign off for the night and return with more stories tomorrow! …….. the keys for the doors here look like this…. (I may just steal one and make myself a sweet necklace). …

 

And that was a failed picture upload because I can’t figure out how to save pictures to this ridiculous Ubuntu running computer. …..Icelanders….. -_-   smh…

Music Monday

The song for today was inspired from a sunny weekend afternoon cruising carefree and happy in the spring breeze, but since I first heard this song just a few days ago, it’s taken on a whole different connotation for me.

I stumbled across this blog from my dear cousin and friend Lilia. Her friend Katya, faced with terminal cancer and only 25, decided to start a blog to document her final experiences with life, determined not to waste her cancer.

http://katyaandco.blogspot.com/

Here’s a snippet from this hilariously clever young woman with such resilience and strength of will that you feel like just knowing this person would make you a better person.

“That being said, I’m not a robot. I do get sad and upset when I think about leaving my family behind. I’ve had so many amazing memories, and I wish I’d made better use of my time to have created more of those. I guess that’s what I really want to get across. Live each day like it’s your last. It sounds so cliche, but when you really think about it, it changes your perspective on absolutely everything. And truth be told, none of us know when it’s our time to go. Even in my case, I find myself taking things for granted because it’s not like I’m dying tomorrow, right? I’ve got at least a few more days… Wrong. I want to live each day to it’s fullest potential. I want to embrace the highs and the lows. I want to love like I’ve never loved. I want to live so that I’m missed.”

My lovely sister has recently written a brilliant post on the topic as well, in consideration of a friend’s death. Its funny how the first thing we do when faced with the difficulties of others, is reflect upon ourselves, all the while we attempt at humility and selflessness. Such creatures we are and such sin has made us.

With death all around. I can’t wait for the day when love reigns, as the song goes in French……..(it sounds better in French):

“There is a sense of urgency,

Compassion is non-existent

There is enormous wealth

That awaits every woman, man

Forget about all prejudices,

Give us a chance to love

It should not hurt

With the things that you can not change

But one day, that love reigns and money loses its value….”

…..because love has already won.

so go and share that love. i for one stand before God broken and empty asking him to fill me with His love. with the strength and power to care for people my flesh doesn’t care about. that’s how the lost get found….

Find Your Man….

These days its become difficult to find a quality person, so where does a girl go to meet the man of her dreams?

Let’s look at the options….

1) Whole foods

Finding a man in this wholesome grocery store means you can count on him to be someone aware of his health and leading a sustainable lifestyle. Just be careful he isn’t there with alternative motives, sporting his hipster look and careless attitude….as you are….., yet secretly shopping for his future wife.

2) Gym

Not only is this man mindful of a healthy lifestyle through regular exercise, but he cares about his appearance and wants to impress you with his muscular physique, or lean physique, depending on where in the gym he spends most of his time.

3) Farm

He is hearty and wholesome and probably shops at Whole Foods too, unless he is tending to his own crops and grows them for personal consumption. The ultimate organic, he doesn’t need to go to the gym because he’s out on the farm daily- and this ain’t no Farmville.

4) Facebook

What once was a safe place to find future spouses or significant others has now become a prowling ground for desperate teenagers with an axe to grind …or angst to grind. Attempts to find a man in the realm of the Facebook may only result in futility, unless you are willing to expend significant amounts of time and energy ….stalking….liking….and general wiling your way into his life (first online and eventually into RL).

5) RL or “Real Life”

This could be in your neighborhood, in the park, or other public areas where men can be found. Disclaimer: Does not include buildings, only open air arenas.

The best way to snag a man here would be to grab his attention with a large quantity of randomness, i.e. 99 luftballoons.    The type of man to love randomness won’t be bothered by your inability to be consistent in the relationship or your spontaneous outings and questionable whereabouts…

6) Rave/club

With the very real probability that he will look like a rabid squirrel and quite possibly be on drugs/wasted/high/passed out/ or worse…not remember your name I would suggest the man of your dreams is not/here. But in the interest of salvaging this midnight mistake, keep an eye on his DD friends…

7) Day care

He is young enough not to care about your age and will give you all the love you deserve. and candy.

8.) Day job

Finding a man at your day job tells you that you both share common goals and passions- at least for the present- and that you are both equals when it comes to getting a job at your place of business. Wherever this man and you may work together during the day, leave room for the alternate reality that an animal may come out at night. See above # 6).

9) Coffee shop

You’ll see the tamer side of a man who dwells in his natural environment of Starbucks. Depending on the drink in his hand, next to his Mac and iphone, you’ll be able to tell how much of a risk taker/adventurer he is. Quad venti extra skinny soy vanilla redeye latte anyone?

10) Airport

Finding a man at the airport isn’t hard since 95% of people who travel are middle aged business men. Keep an eye out for the talkative, balding, light baggage ones who switch seats to sit next to you on the plane. Tells you much about their marital/willingness situation.

I wish you much happiness in finding the man who’s right for you. Keep your eyes peeled and remember: “Men are everywhere. Stop thinking lack, start thinking abundance.”

As for me….. I’m going to hang out in the grocery store until I run into Michael Buble…

Stumblings….

I came across this note in my phone full of quotes or random thoughts I have in my day and choose to write down….

So I just decided to write down the whole series of my ramblings thus far….

some I wanted to transform into blog posts, but I never seem to have the time.

Listen to this song while you read em….(it might only work on YouTube)

Quotes:

Sometimes you come across people in life that stir your soul for Christ.

The most interesting people in the world are those who pursue their passions.

It is quite enough that we are loved.

I love Jesus in you and that makes me love you,

The truth in love will set you free!

Rejoice always giving thanks in every situation.

Being grateful for what you have…..car example….. caught up in my self righteousness and pragmatism

I do believe its important to learn to live simple and be content.

“If you want to be happy, be.” -Tolstoy

When everything in your life weaves together its almost impossible to write a nice concise blog post about it, but I shall try.

I fell apart when I fell for you,

And I have to ask God to break me every single day so I live with a spirit that is kneeled before Him and people…

A broken and contrite heart I will not despise.

I need your hurt, I need your pain. Its not love any other way. -Tenth Avenue North

God sends you disappointment to teach you what love is,

Look through your pain and pride to find what is true and worth holding on to.

Everything else in life you can’t take with you.

With every single pursuit in my life -apart from God- He’s been teaching me…

To fall in love with Him and love and pursue Him only.

Deep Biblical truths and daily relevant truths in the Bible go hand in hand. -JD Greear

Letters of complaint and compliment to God……Blog title

Sometimes when you sit back and look at your life and take a full assessment of your circumstance, your friends and family, you can choose to either smile or cry,

And thats what Christianity is- the freedom to make that choice on how you view life- a worldview- and that affects your behavior….how you live.

Don’t you know who you are? What has been done for you?

So stop feeling sorry for yourself and have joy!

You have to fight for joy.

Disappointment principle- God ordains failures in your life so that you make less of yourself and more of Him. (2 Sam)

The love of God is on everyone but not in everyone.

Prayer- empty my hands, fill up my heart, and capture my mind with you.

God already knows who you are, without stalking you on Facebook.

I don’t care to know who my husband will be. God is preparing that man….and me…. to meet in His perfect timing and according to His will- only in that way will He be most glorified through us.

Life is not long, and too much of it must not pass in idle deliberation on how it shall be spent. – Samuel Johnson

Idleness warps the mind. – Henry Ford

Industry is the enemy of melancholy. -William F. Buckley

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. – Oscar Wilde